Last Friday, I put my blog on maintenance mode and posted this update:
Sorry for the inconvenience. But I have something to say. Something that I need to get out because I have been sort of embarrassed to say it.
I don’t like my blog design. Or my blog right now in some ways.
Earlier this year, I set out on a personal journey towards simplifying my life. [Still on that journey and loving it…so no complaints there.] I thought this meant that simplifying needed to spill over into every nook and cranny of me…school, kids, marriage, blog, house, Jesus, home, chores…everything. But as I am learning about simplifying, I am realizing that even though I LOVE the journey, this isn’t my voice. You know how they say [who is they by the way?] to find your niche and stick to it? Write to it? Well, I forced my mommy, wife, grad student, Jesus loving self into the “simplify” niche…and its not me. Simplifying my life is a part of my journey right now.
But you know what I really want to write about? Being a mom. Being a student. Loving my husband and little people well. Learning from my hurts. Leaning into Jesus. THAT is my niche.
So if you came looking for “the simple blog,” well, I’m sorry if I disappoint you by saying that “simplifying” won’t be the theme I speak from. It will totally be something I talk about, but it isn’t my voice. I’m so sorry. If you want to listen how I implement simplicity into my life as a mom, wife, student, and more, then I hope you stick around.
Right now, I am redesigning my site back to erin lauray. It will have a new color scheme, will be built on an amazing WordPress theme, and will hopefully encompass all that I am as a person.
The reason why this scared me was because I have changed my design a lot. I have new ideas that I get excited about and run with. So my fear is that you will see this as another one of my changes that won’t stick. Honestly, I pray this sticks. But who knows? A year from now, I may be a different person with different dreams who needs a blog that reflects that. When I change my design or whatever, I see it as a representation of how life is. We are constantly changing and learning and growing…and I would hope that when you come back to visit a year from now that I am not the same person. I really would hope that.
So here’s to new beginnings…again…and learning about who I am in the process.
While I was terrified of what people in the interwebs would think of me, I was more concerned with continuing to try and be someone I was not. What I am learning in my #simplify journey is that simplicity isn’t a one size fits all type situation. For me, that was making things less simple.
What I came to was this intense desire to get back to what I truly love and what my life is all about right now: parenting, motherhood, school, being a wife, and discovering myself as a woman and a person in this grand story that God is weaving through time. When I stiff-armed the mom blog in exchange for something different, I was also finding a lack of content ideas and a lack of passion behind writing. I want to write about life. About victories and moments of joy and also burned dinners and tears and pain. I want a community of moms who can support one another in this blessed and hard season of raising little chicks. I have found community so many times through social media and blogs in times when I was unable to find community in person.
I want to be that place for other women who are in that same season. A season of needing a girlfriend to talk to. Someone who will listen. I want to write about things that are real, things that make other moms/wives/women/people go, “YES. ME TOO.” I want to share my journey towards becoming a therapist and all that journey is teaching me about my life, my parenting, my relationships, and myself.
I hope that this place can be a place where you, too, can be encouraged. Uplifted. Challenged. Real.
So go tell all your friends…lets build something good here.
xo – E