This past week, my husband and I watched X-Men: Days of Future Past. I’m not really a superhero or comic book movie type girl. I mean, I’ll see them and most likely enjoy them, but I’m not first in line when they come out. [Who are we kidding, I barely ever go to the movies anymore…I’m not first in line for anything. lol] When it comes to the X-Men movies though, I really do love watching them. My favorite character is Charles Xavier, the professor. He’s just so calm and wise. And often says something that changes the thinking [and inevitably the life] of others. ;)
When we watched Days of Future past, there was a scene where Charles is speaking to himself [I don’t want to say much more because I don’t want to spoil it for anyone who hasn’t seen it], and I was almost in tears over the following quote:
It’s not their pain you’re afraid of. It’s yours, Charles. And as frightening as it can be, that pain will make you stronger. If you allow yourself to feel it, embrace it, it will make you more powerful than you ever imagined. It’s the greatest gift we have: to bear their pain without breaking. And it comes from the most human part of us: hope.
So much of what we do as therapists is utterly terrifying. Walking through someone’s rape experience, divorce, abandonment with them is agonizing. Pain is uncomfortable and often Americans shy away from it. Its painful for us to endure the tears, anger, grief, loss of another without it tearing our insides to shreds. We avoid conflict, vulnerability, and honesty because of the feelings it elicits.
But being a therapist is exactly like what Charles is speaking of. Being a compassionate human is exactly what Charles is speaking of. We need to let the pain of our clients, friends, family, others… empower us to help them. We need to embrace and feel their pain in order to let it move the deepest parts of us. Move us to tears, move us to compassion, move us to action. When we experience someone else’s world, we are able to move out of ourselves. We are able to see a side of the earth that we’ve never experienced. And if the Lord chooses to use us, we can offer them something that they cannot see: HOPE.
No one ever said that being compassionate for someone else meant agreeing with them. But the Bible does say to bear one another’s burdens. And that is one of the greatest gifts we can give one another. Christ did that for us long before we ever said yes to him. He bore our burdens and gave us hope. Now we are given the gift of doing so for one another.